The threats being made by the Democrat Party against innocent Republican Donors and Party Members are absolutely unprecedented, and totally illegal. Please report them to the Department of Justice, IMMEDIATELY! If you would like, send them directly to me, your President. These SLEAZEBAGS should go to jail for what they are doing. The Senate must act, and stop being pushed around to the point of the Republican Party losing Elections, and worse! Likewise, the DOJ and House of Representatives. Thank you for your attention to this matter. President DONALD J. TRUMP
United Kingdom · The Yorkshire edition
Send them directly to me
Donald J. Trump
OriginalThe Yorkshire version
Yorkshire (United Kingdom)
SatireThreatening letters, is it? Then take them to the police, love. That’s what they’re for. Sending them to the President is a long way to post something, and dear on stamps.
As for “sleazebags” and “jail”, we’d want to hear both sides first. Round here, you don’t call a man a crook till you’ve seen his accounts.
In plain English
Yorkshire’s advice: take threats to the police, not to the President (it would cost a fortune in postage anyway).
And before calling anyone a criminal, look at the evidence.
All versionsVaudoisValaisanGenevoisParisienSud de la FranceCh’tiNew YorkDeep SouthThe British DiplomatThe French DiplomatThe Swiss President
An independent satirical project. Original statements are sourced and attributed. All presidential and regional adaptations are fictional, AI-assisted editorial interpretations.