I will be interviewed tonight on “60 Minutes.” Hopefully, they will show all the good things we’ve done over the past 2 years, not even including the First Term, which was incredible. If we get help from the Republican Senate, we can still do things that are unbelievable! President DJT
Hopefully, they will show all the good things
Donald J. Trump
OriginalThe presidential version
The American President
SatireTonight I will sit down with 60 Minutes. I welcome the chance to answer hard questions and to speak directly to the American people about the work of the past two years: what we have achieved, and what remains to be done.
With the support of the Senate, there is still a great deal we can accomplish together, and I intend to make that case.
Around the world
Switzerland & France
Fribourgeois (Switzerland)
SatireSalut les gaillards ! Ce soir je passe à la télé, à « 60 Minutes ». J’espère qu’ils montreront tout le bon travail.
Chez nous, une heure, c’est juste le temps d’une fondue moitié-moitié. Et le meilleur, c’est à la fin : la religieuse, au fond du caquelon. Alors gardez le meilleur pour la fin, et demandez un coup de main au Sénat, comme on demande au voisin de passer le pain.
English version
Hey folks! I’m on TV tonight, on “60 Minutes”. I hope they’ll show all the good work.
Round here, an hour is just the time it takes to eat a fondue. And the best part comes last: the crispy crust of cheese at the bottom of the pot. So save the best for the end, and ask the Senate for a hand, the way you’d ask your neighbour to pass the bread.
Neuchâtelois (Switzerland)
SatireCe soir, je passe à « 60 Minutes ». J’espère qu’ils montreront tout ce que j’ai fait de bien en deux ans, sans compter le premier mandat, qui était incroyable.
Bon, chez nous, une montre, on ne la juge pas sur ce que l’horloger en dit à la télé : on la porte quelques années, et on voit si elle retarde. Moi, je ne retarde jamais. Enfin, presque. Et si le Sénat me donne un coup de main, on fera des choses à faire tourner toutes les aiguilles.
English version
I’m on “60 Minutes” tonight. I hope they’ll show all the good things I’ve done in two years, not even counting the first term, which was incredible.
Mind you, round here we don’t judge a watch by what the watchmaker says about it on TV: we wear it for a few years and see whether it runs slow. Me, I never run slow. Well, hardly ever. And if the Senate gives me a hand, we’ll do things that make every hand on the dial spin.
Lyonnais (France)
SatireCe soir, je passe à « 60 Minutes ». J’espère qu’ils montreront tout le bon.
Mes deux ans, c’est comme un bouchon lyonnais : on vient pour la carte, on reste pour l’assiette. Et le premier mandat, c’était le tablier de sapeur : incroyable. Si le Sénat m’aide, je commande un deuxième pot, et là, les gones, ce sera inoubliable.
English version
I’m on “60 Minutes” tonight. I hope they’ll show all the good stuff.
My two years are like a Lyon bistro: you come for the menu, you stay for what’s on the plate. And the first term was the house speciality: incredible. If the Senate helps, I’ll order a second jug of wine, and then, guys, it’ll be unforgettable.
Breton (France)
SatireCe soir, je passe à « 60 Minutes ». J’espère qu’ils montreront le bon côté de deux ans de travail.
Ici, on dit qu’il faut attendre la fin de la marée pour voir ce que la mer a laissé sur la plage. Moi, je préfère qu’on regarde à marée haute. Et si le Sénat veut bien ramer avec moi, on ira loin, même par vent contraire.
English version
I’m on “60 Minutes” tonight. I hope they’ll show the good side of two years’ work.
Here we say you have to wait for the tide to go out to see what the sea has left on the beach. Personally, I’d rather they looked at high tide. And if the Senate is willing to row with me, we’ll go far, even against the wind.
United States
California (United States)
SatireSo I’m doing 60 Minutes tonight. Hopefully they show all the good stuff from the past two years. Honestly, it’s been a whole journey. The first term? Incredible. Very on-brand.
If the Senate gets on board, we can totally manifest some unbelievable things. Let’s just keep the energy positive.
In plain English
He hopes the interview will be positive, calls his two years “a journey”, and says the first term was “on-brand”, in the language of Californian wellness and marketing.
With the Senate’s help, he wants to “manifest” big results: a Los Angeles way of saying “achieve”.
Midwest (United States)
SatireWell, I’ll be on 60 Minutes tonight, if anybody’s interested. I sure hope they show some of the good things we’ve done these past two years.
I don’t like to brag, but the first term went pretty darn well too. And if the folks in the Senate could lend a hand, why, we could get a whole lot done. No pressure.
In plain English
Midwestern modesty: he mentions the interview almost apologetically and hopes they’ll show a few good things.
He “doesn’t like to brag” (while bragging a little) and asks the Senate for help in the most polite way possible.
United Kingdom
Manchester (United Kingdom)
SatireI’m on 60 Minutes tonight. Hopefully they show all the good bits of the last two years, and the first term, which was class, to be fair.
Mind, I know how telly works: you give them an hour and they keep the twelve minutes where you said something daft. So if the Senate could back me up, cheers, that’d be top.
In plain English
He hopes the interview shows his achievements, and calls his first term “class” (excellent, in Manchester English).
But he knows television editing keeps the embarrassing moments, so he asks the Senate to back him up.
The Diplomat
The American President is just above. Here, the other statesmen.
The British Diplomat
SatireHis Majesty’s Government notes that the President will appear this evening on a respected American current affairs programme, and trusts that the exchange will be as illuminating as these occasions so often are.
We would observe, gently, that one rarely chooses which parts of an interview are broadcast. That, after all, is rather the point of a free press.
What he really means
He wants the programme to show only the good bits.
That is not how journalism works, and we think that is a good thing.
The French Diplomat
SatireFrance welcomes every opportunity for a head of state to account for his record before a free press. An hour of questions on national television is a demanding exercise, and a healthy one for democracy.
We would only add, in friendship, that history tends to judge a record over decades rather than in a single broadcast, however well edited.
The Swiss President
SatireThe Federal Council has taken note of this television interview.
In Switzerland, the President of the Confederation changes every year, which leaves little time for a two-year retrospective. Our record is set out in the Federal Council’s annual report to Parliament: several hundred pages, rarely broadcast in prime time.